Pre-session digest
Amara & Jonas · 11:00 AM today
Amara & Jonas
Gottman · session 13 · together 11 years
What changed between sessions
Conflict ticked up. Lead with the start-up.
Amara caught her harsh start-up once and reported it felt different. Jonas completed half the stress-reducing conversation before slipping into fixing. Self-reported argument frequency rose this week.
Slow down the start-up in session. Give Jonas a flooding signal and a 20-minute repair window.
Homework
Stress-reducing conversation
Risk change
Argument frequency up. No safety concern reported. Worth a gentle check-in.
Reflections that came back
“I led with criticism again. I caught it this time.”
From the relational timeline
Session 12 · Gottman
Worked the harsh start-up. Practiced complaint-without-blame. Jonas's defensiveness softened by the end.
Rupture: stonewalling
Jonas left the room for ~10 min after a flooding moment. Returned and re-engaged.
Assigned: Stress-reducing conversation
20 minutes, no problem-solving. Twogle guided prompt.
Amara reflected
“I led with criticism again. I caught it this time, which felt different.”